The owner of Finca Esperanza and Two Birds Coffee talks about the challenges of growing coffee during the climate crisis, the price surge, and what it all means for the future of coffee in Guatemala.
We used to grudgingly turn to coffee alternatives in times of turmoil. Now, however, there is a new breed of venture capital-backed substitutes, with a more antagonistic relationship to coffee.
A quick roundup for you this week, as there’s not a lot going on in the coffee world.
Meet the new year, same as the old year.
It didn’t take long for the coffee company acquisitions to start again this year. Wilbur Curtis, the second largest US manufacturer of “professional coffee goods”, has been purchased by a French conglomerate, Groupe SEB. Which, if we’re honest, sounds like a parody of JAB Holdings, which owns every other coffee company (and a bunch of other related companies).
WIlbur Curtis Company makes those coffee pots you often see in diners, with the glass carafe beneath a hulking metal brewer. This alone makes them cool in my book, but they also sell high-end batch brewers for specialty cafes as well as the extremely fancy Seraphim and Gold Cup automated single cup pour-over devices.
They’re legit, in other words, and honestly it’s a little surprising that one of JAB, Coca-Cola, or (sigh) Nestlé hadn’t already scooped them up. This allows Groupe SEB—the totally not made up owner of a bunch of small appliance brands like Krups and Tefal—get in on the coffee acquisition action, before they’re also inevitably bought out by JAB or (sigh) Nestlé.
Howard Schultz, the former Starbucks CEO, was keen on the Reserve brand (the third wave-aping monstrosity full of siphons and trying-too-hard upcycled wood trim). He claimed over the years that his company planned to open 1,000 cafes across the world, in addition to 100 Reserve roasteries.
But how many have they opened thus far? Four roasteries (in Seattle, New York, Shanghai, and Milan) with two more to come in Chicago and Tokyo.
And just one Reserve cafe, within the company’s Seattle headquarters.
Now that Schultz is out and a new president, central casting’s Kevin Johnson, is in, that’s probably the extent of it.
Johnson is considered a more conservative leader than his predecessor, focusing primarily on increasing sales at current Starbucks locations in addition to introducing delivery service across the US and China.
Good luck with that, Kev.
This was always going to happen, wasn’t it?
There’s that Friends cafe, and there’s a Mos Eisley Cantina in LA, so it was only a matter of time before someone did a Harry Potter-themed establishment.
Well, sort-of Harry Potter-themed.
It’s not licensed, so don’t expect moving wanted pictures of Gary Oldman or a menu with stuff like chocolate frogs or flagons of Butterbeer and whatnot (those are things, right?)
There is, however, a stuffed owl and a cauldron.
So yeah, witches and wizards. Cool.
Coffee infused with the magical substance known as CBD (a non-psychoactive cannabinoid compound found in marijuana) is all the rage right now.
Seriously, it’s everywhere. It’s a veritable wellness trend (whatever that is).
But is it legal?
Ehhh [makes “sort of” hand gesture]
The Food and Drug Administration (FDA) recently clarified its position on regulating CBD-infused foodstuffs, basically saying that it treats it like any other substance which needs regulating. CBD-containing products are “subject to the same authorities and requirements as FDA-regulated products containing any other substance,” according to FDA Commissioner Scott Gottlieb.
So unless you have explicit permission from the FDA, you can’t sell your CBD wellness latte in many states, and especially not across state lines (which is what a lot of online merchants are trying to do).
Will that stop people selling it?
Judging by the number of products for sale online currently, no.
Order a black coffee. From elsewhere.
That was easy.
Read the full story here. But don’t.
It’s January, and with January comes diet remorse after the excesses of the holiday season. But how to deal with it? Apparently, by adding random substances to your coffee. We’ve discussed mushroom coffee and butter coffee before. Or you could try collagen, if you’re Kelly Ripa (I don’t know who that is either).
Or gelatin, if you’re a monster.
Look, just stop it. Coffee is healthy enough already.
What is wrong with people.
Starbucks’s Massive New Chelsea Roastery Is A Coffee Theme Park Apocalypse by Ryan Sutton
How Coffee Initiatives Can Help Save Lives by Nicole Motteux
The Tenth Annual Sprudgie Award Winners—Presented By Oatly by Sprudge Staff
Until next week, drink good coffee. Without gelatin, please.
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A newsletter about coffee—its culture, politics, and how it connects to the wider world.
